Why Are You So Half-Baked?

Bread - The Staff of Life

(Bake Responsibly Employing All the Dough.)

Have you seen Food Inc.? I'm not really sure if you should see it on an empty or full stomach, but you should see it. It is a mind-opening, albeit discouraging, documentary.

At least some food producers are making attempts to raise and distribute organic, ethical and humane crops and meats. It made me wonder where yeast fits into the fabric of life. Is it a plant or animal? Should vegans avoid yeast and yeast products?

Yeasts are fungi as it turns out. Saccharomyces_cerevisiae is the name of the fungus responsible for beer, wine, cheese, yogurt, vinegar, sauerkraut, sourdough doughnuts; and of course, bread. The taming of the yeast was probably more important to kitchen civilization than "The Taming of the Shrew," but there's really no need to go there right now. The picture above shows Cinnamon Pecan Sticky Buns, a calorie-enriched distant relative of what is often called "The Staff of Life."

Bread is a staple without which one's life can be miserable at worst and mundane at best. Not only is it a staple around the world, but variations have become delicacies. Bread has "terroire" as wine and cheeses do and the yeast mixed with the huge numbers of grain flour varieties, gives us an abundance of bread types, ranging from dark, dense German "Rogenbrot" to delicate, airy croissants. Vive la patisserie Francaise!

If you don't have a bread machine or food processor, get one! We'll wait. It's worth it. Besides, we're going to make a braided egg bread, or Challah and we'll be counting on the machinery to do the initial mixing and kneading. This recipe makes a 24 oz loaf that will be gone before you can even begin to think about what fabulous French Toast this would make in the morning. So here are the instructions with a few pictures for reference.



Ingredients (in the order recommended
by your machine)
3/4 cup water
1/4 cup butter
2 eggs
1 yolk (save the white for an egg wash)
2 tbsp sugar
1-1/2 tsp salt
3 cups white bread flour
2-1/4 tsp active dry yeast
poppy seed or sesame seed
Egg wash - white + 1 tbsp water
Whisk vigorously.

Set machine on "Dough" cycle

After finishing in machine, remove dough and punch down.

Divide dough into 3 equal portions and roll into 15"-18" strands.

Pinch the ends of the strands firmly together and braid the strands.

Pinch the other ends together.

Place on a lightly greased sheet in a warm place.

Cover and allow to rise, doubling in size.

Brush with the egg wash and sprinkle with poppy seed or sesame seed.

Bake at 375F for 20-25 minutes.







Bet you can't wait until it cools before trying some!
















The following was awarded 3rd prize in the Leacock Festival Limerick Contest a few years ago.

Said a bread baker's wife in Schenectady,
There's a dozen now have the vasectomy.
But with thoughts of a knife
Near his own staff of life,
He insisted his tubes should connected be.

Copyright 2010 Stargeazer